I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN