If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
