Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
