I cannot find my penis.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
My penis needs a shock collar
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
