Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Randomize
