matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
