During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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