Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous

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  (608): I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous http://tfl.nu/1bk0
  Replies (14) Good night (5439) Bad night (539)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!

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  (815): Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie! http://tfl.nu/p3px
  Replies (27) Good night (1986) Bad night (3895)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.

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  (954): I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay. http://tfl.nu/trm1
  Replies (8) Good night (3025) Bad night (881)
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  (951): View more from California

  apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.

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  (951): apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex. http://tfl.nu/6011
  Replies (10) Good night (2270) Bad night (1080)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out

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  (705): I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out http://tfl.nu/lvnp
  Replies (5) Good night (2443) Bad night (988)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently

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  (204): Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently http://tfl.nu/ky82
  Replies (78) Good night (1003) Bad night (3544)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'

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  (615): I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA' http://tfl.nu/bh1s
  Replies (3) Good night (1835) Bad night (639)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.

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  (305): It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you. http://tfl.nu/cw12
  Replies (26) Good night (5546) Bad night (963)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy

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  (214): And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy http://tfl.nu/y3l1
  Replies (15) Good night (2163) Bad night (669)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Let's drink?

  (1-319): View more from Iowa

  Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.

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  (319): Let's drink? (1-319): Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/5wza
  Replies (5) Good night (1735) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.

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  (949): I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that. http://tfl.nu/q7ek
  Replies (2) Good night (436) Bad night (856)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.

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  (303): He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled. http://tfl.nu/tlei
  Replies (2) Good night (395) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED

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  (205): I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED http://tfl.nu/p5zl
  Replies (5) Good night (305) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor

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  (646): Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor http://tfl.nu/9swp
  Replies (1) Good night (479) Bad night (206)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  You can wear anything you want

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  So... Naked it is then

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  (262): You can wear anything you want (704): So... Naked it is then http://tfl.nu/h72c
  Replies (1) Good night (818) Bad night (209)

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