Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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