so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
