Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
