I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
