omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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