my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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