Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
