The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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