you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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