the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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