break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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