Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize