So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I want to be your penis for a week.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
