Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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