is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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