you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
