it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
