Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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