awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
