so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
