I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize