I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
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