I'm laying in your front yard are you home
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Still dying that you shit outside
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
