I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize