she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
