Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
