It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
