omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
