I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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