so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
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I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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