All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
