I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
im six kinds of drunk right now
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
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this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
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