remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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