is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.