Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
