If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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