her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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