i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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