I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Rumble strips road head = magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize