I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
