I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize