Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize