drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Randomize