Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
