He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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